Do you hear a voice on a never-ending loop in your head saying negative things? Things like, “I’m such a loser. I’m so pathetic…bad…ugly…worthless…stupid…defective. If only I wasn’t so needy and selfish…” etc, etc., etc. This is the voice of your inner critic, an internalized version of the voices of those who bullied and criticized you, those you could never please. This inner critic joins your fear of abandonment to your self-hate about your imperfections. Learn ways to overcome it!

How to Use Thought Stopping to Control Unwanted Thoughts (article on website VeryWell Mind)

Negative Self-Talk (article on website The Friendly Mind)

How to Turn Negative Thoughts Into Positive Actions (article on website MindTools)

4 Ways to Stop Negative Thinking (article on webpage Everything You Need To Know About Mental Health from McClain Hospital’s website)

The Toxic Effects of Negative Self-Talk (article on website VeryWell Mind)

Discover your true self hidden beneath all of the “shoulds.” Explore your thoughts and feelings, get to know yourself better, and understand what you do and why you do it. Know your own core values, act with authenticity and integrity, and build self-love and confidence.

How to Cultivate a Sense of Unconditional Self-Worth (article from website Ideas.Ted.Com)

6 Ways to Discover and Choose Your Core Values (article from website Psychology Today)

The Path of Self-Love (website)

3 Root Causes of Low Self-Confidence (article from website Nick Wignall)

The term complex trauma refers to ongoing hurtful treatment, usually at the hands of caregivers or close loved ones, that overwhelms the victim’s ability to cope and results in lasting psychological and emotional wounds. It can be difficult to admit, even to yourself, that you were victimized in this way because often the word trauma is associated only with physical or sexual abuse. Research shows, however, that the “invisible” harm caused by psychological and emotional abuse or neglect can be more damaging than maltreatment that leaves physical scars. In fact, all of the other topics listed on this page can be caused by complex trauma.

Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving (book)

Death by a Thousand Cuts: The Insidious Impact of Psychological Maltreatment (article on website Complex Trauma Resources)

You deserve to be respected, heard, and valued in your relationships, in addition to not being physically hurt. When someone ignores you, treats your feelings and thoughts as unimportant, throws your past in your face, calls you names, belittles you, or uses fear and guilt to get you to comply, that is emotional abuse. Both emotional and physical maltreatment constitute abuse, and both are detrimental to your mental well-being. Learn more through these links.

Victims of Emotional Abuse (article on PsychCentral website)

The Healing Path (downloadable guide on the Domestic Violence Community Coordinated Response Team website)

What Is Emotional Abuse (article on National Domestic Violence Hotline website)

Create Your Personal Safety Plan (article on National Domestic Violence Hotline website)

Understanding Dating & Domestic Violence (article on website Stop the Hurt)

Emotional Abuse: Signs and Support (article on website WebMD)

18 Ways to Handle Emotional Blackmail (article on website Positive Psychology)

Are you irritable, fatigued, and unmotivated? You may be suffering from depression.

10 Ways to Cope With Depression (article on website Everyday Health)

9 Signs You Have an Unhealthy Relationship with Your Emotions (article on website Nick Wignall)

Based on extensive research, Brené Brown defines shame as the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging. We feel like something we’ve experienced, done, or failed to do makes us unworthy of connection. Shame often leaves us feeling immobilized, or worse, feeling ready to strike out as a way of offloading the pain of disconnection. Visit her website for tons of resources to help you heal.

Brené Brown (website)

Know who you are—and who you want to be. Learn how to stand up for yourself, both with yourself and others. Be aware of what is unacceptable, become able to say no, and do what is best for you. It is not your responsibility to sacrifice yourself for others.

Boundaries (article on website GoodTherapy)

16 Reminders for Healthy Boundaries (article on website Integrative Psychotherapy)

How to Set Family Boundaries (article on Talkspace Blog)

Do you focus intensely on other people and their problems and do too much for them? If you feel responsible for everyone and everything, are extremely self-critical, ignore your own needs, and have trouble being assertive and setting boundaries, you may be struggling with codependency.

What Are the Signs of Codependency? (article on website PsychCentral)

Do You Have a Codependent Personality? (article on website Everyday Health)

If you learn to listen to your emotions instead of being afraid of them, they will speak to you and tell you what you really want and need.

Why Are Feelings Important (article on website PsychCentral)

How to Deal With Negative Emotions (article on website VeryWell Mind)

Putting yourself on your to-do list and regularly engaging in activities that make you feel good is crucial to your well-being. Why is it so hard, and why does it make us feel selfish?

Roadmap to Self-Care (downloadable PDF)

Is Self-Care Selfish? (article on website Psychology Today)

Do you get caught in repetitive thought loops? Feel like you’re “in your head” too much? This is called overthinking and it is a harmful habit that negatively impacts your mental health.

Overthinking Disorder: Is It a Mental Illness? (article on Cleveland Clinic’s website)

10 Signs You're an Overthinker (article on website Inc.com)

The environments you grew up in—and how well the adults in your life cared for you—formed your attachment style. In turn, your style of attachment influences how you feel and behave in your relationships.

Attachment Styles And Their Role In Relationships (article on website Simply Psychology)

How Attachment Styles Influence Romantic Relationships (article on Columbia University’s Department of Psychiatry website)

Self-compassion is being kind and understanding with yourself when you are not perfect. If you often are harsh and judgmental with yourself, criticizing yourself mercilessly and beating yourself up when you fail, you can learn to build your capacity for treating yourself with compassion and empathy when you are suffering.

Self-Compassion (website)

Practicing Self-Compassion: 20 Phrases for Difficult Moments (on website Anti-Loneliness)

Struggling with obsessive thoughts, irresistible compulsions, or OCD? Help is available!

Everything You Need To Know About OCD (article on McLean Hospital’s website)

A trauma bond is when a person forms a deep emotional attachment with someone who causes them harm. It often develops from a repeated cycle of abuse and positive reinforcement. When this occurs between partners, this is a trauma-bonded relationship.

How to Recognize and Break Traumatic Bonds (article on website Healthline)

Identifying & Overcoming Trauma Bonds (article on National Domestic Violence website)

Living with a developmental disability—your own or a loved one’s—can cause extreme stress. There are resources out there that can help!

Cerebral Palsy Guide (website)

Michigan Developmental Disabilities Council (website)